I often say that work gets in the way of my productivity. It does. Thoughts of being independently wealthy, living on an island with Lefty, good food, books and an Internet connection often run through my mind... while at work. Since I spend so much time with my co-workers, I have decided to write about them, just so y'all can see what I have to deal with. It is sheer craziness.
I work for a large manufacturing company, which shall remain nameless in these posts. Every day I help produce a product that is widely used in the United States and the rest of the world. Yay us! Working in a factory ensures that I, daily, run into people of all kinds. There are people from the country, city... Indiana. All walks of life; all sorts of craziness. Need an example? Meet Hey Zeus.
I call this co-worker Hey Zeus because he routinely wears a hat that reads (screams) "Hooked On Jesus". I refuse to type Jesus as his nickname and have readers think I mean the BIG Jesus, so I break it down and he is Hey Zeus. Hey Zeus came to our area, armed with his "Hooked on Jesus" hat and his above the board behavior. That has all gone by the wayside. Hey Zeus used to be quiet and when talk when on the side of the inappropriate (like it often does) he became even more quiet or walked away from the crowd of delinquents. Now sweet little Hey Zeus is right in the thick of things, yucking it up with the heathens of our area, loving life. Gone are the days of the walk away. Oh no!!
Hey Zeus does not know my name. It is on my uniform. I'm convinced he can't read. He calls me a name that RHYMES with my name, but that is really not the same. He stutters and tells very intimate stories about his "magic fingers" (puke). Last week, I (kinda) sexually harassed Hey Zeus... completely inadvertently. Yeah-- I was running a bit behind on a process, quickly turned around, hands up, to start the next unit and ran directly into Hey Zeus, my hands caressing his man boobs. Oh.My.God, just thinking about that makes me feel icky. It has been awhile since I have felt so dirty. Now, every time I see him, I blush and pray that he doesn't tell me the story of his "magic fingers"... Ewwwww.
Hey Zeus will reappear in these stories- of that I am sure. He has taken a small break from wearing his name giving hat... last night it was back. Maybe the innocence has returned? I doubt it.
Tuesday, March 12, 2013
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1 comments:
Stop sexually harassing people ;) Your normal harassment is just fine...
The island sounds good. For now, I could use an implanted stenographer to take down my thoughts while I'm working, so I can write them up later...
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