You know what? Sometimes you need some time with friends to really remember what is important in this life. I'm not talking about acquaintances-- I am talking about friends who know your secrets and still love you; friends that will tell you "uh, you know you are wrong for that" when you need to hear it; friends that call your parents mom and dad; friends that love your baby like she is their baby.
Sometimes your mind needs you to be in close proximity to folks who just GET YOU. So you don't feel like you are losing yourself in fear, or guilt, or any other emotion that is presently all encompassing. Sometimes only close friends can bring a smile to your face and help you forget- even for a short time- that life can be grating.
These last 16 months or so has been an especially horrid time for most of us. We have lived through some awful shit (and some of us haven't made it through). We have seen each other on Zoom, at the grocery store scrounging for the last fruits and vegetables, at funerals and masked up from six feet away. We have been cocooned in our homes, away from some of our loved ones. Since I got vaccinated I have been able to see a few friends, in very controlled situations. I am glad to say that today I was able to meet up with some buddies of mine, in a park, and really just kick it. Don't get me wrong, we have a text thread that is well used, because they don't live here, but it was just so nice to see their faces. The weather cooperated (mostly) and we were able to just shoot the shit, gossip and laugh. Me? I got to pet ALL the dogs and run from ducks and geese... and escape my house for a few hours. Can only be described as pure joy. Pure joy.