Wednesday, November 27, 2013

Tis The Season for…

Hello capitalism and those who love it! Tis the season for you to go out and buy a whole bunch of shit you don't need, so you can seem just a little cooler to people who don't (shouldn't) matter! Oh happy day! There are deals to be had! There will be small lines (woo hoo) and most things are on sale (supposedly). And hey, if you get the shopping done on Thursday, there will be less pressure when you are out shopping it up on Black Friday, right?

And you know what my vote is? Get your asses out there and shop it up!! I see all this fake concern on social media about stores opening on Thanksgiving. How we need to "keep family traditions" and not feed into the hype. Listen, get your asses in line!! No one was talking this Thanksgiving shit when the iPhone 5 came out. (BTW- why do people still stand in line for shit like that?) Get out there! Help strengthen the economy! Shop before, after and possibly while eating your turkey dinner. Get to the stores and buy your limit of deals under $100 and find a place to hide that shit so your bad ass kids don't find it before Christmas.

I don't care if you want to shop on Thanksgiving. And truthfully, no one else does either. They just want to raise some hell about something… anything. And if they do truly care about what you do on designated holidays (that you are not celebrating with them, in their home, with their families), then… I'm not going to say they are stupid, but those would NOT be the people I would look to for smart advice. The truth is that not everyone HAS family traditions that they participate in every Thanksgiving/holiday season. There are some people with NO family. There are some people (actually some people that I know) who think that Thanksgiving is just another day, and they don't celebrate. And that number is seemingly on the rise. I mean, the stores aren't just opening for one person. There has to be an economic win for stores to one on a holiday, pay people holiday pay wages and stock the store. Someone is going to show up.

And if that someone is not you-- don't worry about what other people are doing. It is not stopping your show. It is not stopping your family get together. It is not stopping the thousands of fake smiles and "yes, we should get together more often" conversations. Is it? No. You won't be on this high and mighty horse when you are opening presents on Christmas, or pushing old ladies out of the way on Black Friday. You definitely won't be saying that at around 6:00 on Thanksgiving evening when your family members are getting on your nerves so you leave to go to the movie theater, right? So you go right on ahead and enjoy your gluttonous holiday, celebrating the stealing of land; the downfall of the Native Americans; the original sin, as it were, on these shores of America. Now, how does it feel, Debbie Downer? Let those people shop if they want to!!

I, for one, will be hanging out with the Hot, Black and Bitter family and Lefty's family throughout the whole weekend. I will be laughing, taking pictures of my food and drinking more than I should. I will have on elastic waistband pants and an extra large t-shirt and I will fall in love with every piece of pie, every bit of my mashed potatoes and gravy and every forkful of my momma's macaroni and cheese. (Don't you judge me-- my mom makes the best Mac and Cheese around… and no, I will NOT be sharing). I will be thoroughly content and too busy (and thankful) to sit around judging people for not celebrating like I do. Whatever it is that you do during this season… do it and have a blast!

Happy Thanksgiving, y'all!

Saturday, November 23, 2013

Saturday Mojo with HBB

I received an email that asked "what do you and Lefty do for fun?"

Well… we live in Central Ohio and it IS football season, so we do random stuff around the house (like today, I cleaned the carpets in the master bedroom and the hallway) and then we (read: I) watch football. Living so close to Ohio State gives me a great home team to cheer for. Lefty doesn't really watch all the time, but since he graduated from Ohio State and I am *slightly* fanatic about my love for the Buckeyes, he is coming around!

Also tonight, my (not so) little brother, Big Man, and his high school football team will be playing in the Division V Regional final game against some school I have never heard of, in the middle of nowhere. So not only am I typing this while my Buckeyes are on, Lefty and I are stacking on clothing and getting ready to head to Nelsonville, Ohio to freeze our tushes off while loudly embarrassing my 18 year-old brother. This could most truthfully be characterized as the event that is going to brighten my WHOLE day. I am convinced that the Big Man loves it when I scream his name from the stands… and if he doesn't, he better not tell me. Any revelation like that will only make me scream louder.

Really, we do a lot of other things for fun and I will review what we did this summer… and thank you for the question. Keep them coming!!

Just in case Big Man is reading this, here is an inspirational video from my second favorite football team :) Lefty and I will be there rooting for you!! Go Hawks! Go Bucks!!

Thursday, November 21, 2013

Scandalous, Party of 1

Oh dear Lord… it is Thursday. And 10 minutes to 10. You know what that means, right? It means that Scandal is about to start and every timeline that I have is lit up with opinions about the tv show Scandal.

Some of y'all are all about the virtual disapproving head shake, making it a necessity to comment about "how you don't understand what all the fuss is about." Making sure we all know that you would never stoop so low as to watch Olivia Pope have an affair with the pretend President of the United States.  Some of you just can't wait to shame the watchers of the show by either complaining about the interracial relationship, the constant twists and turns of the plot, the "disgusting" display of politics, the gay relationships, the philandering…

You know what? It is a tv show. You all need to relax. So what if I totally have a girl crush on Kerry Washington and her AMAZING wardrobe? So what if I can not WAIT for Thursday nights? So what if I like the fact that the President is cheating on his (horrible) wife with a constant problem solver? Who cares that I am secretly having a love affair with Columbus Short, in his 'gladiator in a suit' line? (PS- he is SO fine!) It is an hour out of the week where I can get lost in a very good television show. I can see inside even fake politics and see the lengths that people will go for money and power. And I happen to LOVE it. Bitch, don't kill my vibe.

Scandalous behavior to commence in 3, 2, 1…

Saturday, November 16, 2013

The Best Man Holiday - A Review

I knew when I saw the previews that I was going to see this movie… by myself. Not because Lefty wouldn't go, but because I wanted to go, by myself. I remember the first movie-- my heart was all aflutter for the sexy black men on the screen. I mean honestly, minus Terrence Howard, serial cheater Eddie Cibrian and Melissa De Sousa, have you seen a more delicious looking cast?? And let me just add, Eddie Cibrian IS hot… he needs to learn to keep it in his pants and not marry LeeAnn Rimes (gross). Nia Long is ALWAYS flawless. She puts these young girls to shame; Taye Diggs… damn; Regina Hall - lovely; Sanaa… y'all already know and last but certainly NOT least, Mr. Morris Chestnut, who happens to be sex magnified to a level I cannot comprehend. Life giving, he takes away the breath of women everywhere… including me. Oh.My.God, the man is… what is better than flawless? Whatever THAT is, he is. I am not kidding. Look for yourself… I will wait for you to catch your breath.

I kinda feel like screaming "Sexual Chocolate!" like one of Eddie Murphy's characters in Coming to America, dropping the mic and getting off stage. And, no, I do not feel bad for it. Mostly because how do you look at this face and feel bad?! You can't.

And again, you ARE welcome. Anyway-- the movie. The movie was a good. It definitely played on all emotions. It was happy, sad… incited anger a few times. It was a good escape from whatever you have going on, because the story quickly envelopes you into the lives of the characters. It is easy to follow, even if you have not seen The Best Man (original) since it came out in 1999 (ahem, me). Everyone kind of fits into the personality they left us with in that movie. I loved how you could see the progression (and sometimes regression) of the characters. I had plenty of problems with the plot-- like how the women (mostly Sanaa and that horrible Melissa de Sousa) can't seem to let go of the past, even with everything that is going on in the movie. And how Morris always directs his anger at the wrong person… But the movie definitely takes you on an emotional roller coaster, and I liked it. Bonus for me? Eddie George makes a cameo appearance and I have loved that man since his days as a Buckeye, thank you very much!! 

Go see the Best Man Holiday-- it will get you in the mood for Christmas, family and forgiveness. **PLUS THERE IS A NEW EDITION 'CAN YOU STAND THE RAIN?' RENDITION TO DIE FOR!!!!** And don't blame me if you faint at the sight of a shirtless Morris Chestnut, or cry a river in the theater. Both of which are possible!! :) 

Wednesday, November 06, 2013

Wedding Whimsy - Kittie's Cakes, A Review

Party planning is currently in overdrive in our household. With less than two months to go, I have a ton of Is to dot and Ts to cross. All I can say is I am working on it. There is one thing that we knew almost from the beginning- we knew who was going to supply the cake/goodies for our party. 

**Disclaimer: I went to the same school as one of the owners of Kittie's Cakes (but she is considerably younger than I am )… however, I am from Columbus and know a fair amount of people here, so our personal relationship has nothing to do with this review. Please check out the flavors on their website HERE-- be excited!!**

Lefty and I started to frequent Kittie's soon after they opened. Seriously, we used to stop by before heading out to work in the factory and the goodies hardly made it through the 40 minute trip. So good. My absolute favorite= the Oatmeal Cream Pies. Fresh cream filling, perfectly baked oatmeal cookies. Are you kidding me?!?! Now, I have to say-- I have a wicked sweet tooth. It is an obsession. I am always looking for something sweet to eat. I usually have candy in my purse and when we worked together, Lefty used to carry a pouch of Fruit Gushers in his lunchbox, just in case I had a sugar need. Yeah- it is bad. So imagine how I behave in a bakery!! 

I can say that I have tried all the flavors at this point (except the new seasonal- Thanksgiving Throwback). I do have favorites (like the three I picked for the party) and some that I have tried once or twice and I will probably never have again (like the Chocolate "Chip"-- which I think is just an acquired taste). As Kittie's gets more and more popular, I am happy to know that our party guests will be enjoying what we think are the best baked goods in the city. I cannot stress how much I want you to go here if you are in Columbus, Ohio… you might even like the Chocolate "Chip"!! Here are a few pics from the last 8 months or so- and at the bottom, the flavors for our party will be revealed!! 

Oatmeal Cream Pie- I cannot explain how fabulous these things are! 

Kittie's Cakes! 

Mini Cupcakes- top Coconut Cream, bottom Cookies & Cream

More mini cupcakes- clockwise- Ooey Gooey Chocolate, Dutch, Classic Buckeye, and White Lavender

Cinnamon Roll Cake-- I do not even share these with Lefty.

So which are my favorites? Oatmeal Cream Pies, Cinnamon Roll Cake (as mentioned above). As far as the cupcake flavors my absolute flavors are as follows: White Out, Coconut Cream, Classic Buckeye and Cookies & Cream. For the party we are having a Coconut Cream Cake, Cookies & Cream Cupcakes and Classic Buckeye Cupcakes. Yum!!

Saturday, November 02, 2013

Soulful Saturday - The Beauty of Car Concerts

I have not been quiet about my hate/hate relationship that I have with Top 40 music. I am sincerely NOT a fan. I don't even think I can help it. I know that the radio has to play shit that appeals to everyone… and what appeals to the majority is generally garbage. Honestly. Most of what is played is ignored in my car. In fact, Lefty has started to rub off on me-- I listen to NPR in the car. I have a MUCH shorter commute to work, so news radio totally fits, especially early in the morning.

With that said, there ARE some catchy tunes on the radio. There are even a few that inspire car concerts. You know what those are, right? A car concert (which happens frequently in the Hot, Black and Bitter mobile) is when you throw caution to the wind, pick up ANYthing that looks like a microphone, throw your head back and sing along to the song you are listening to. And it has to be loud. Loud like your favorite band playing a farewell concert at Fenway. Loud like your past teenage angst. Loud like you don't care about the fact that you are aging and you *might* need that ability to hear tomorrow. You sing along; you might add a little shimmy if you get really into it and most of all, PARAMOUNT, you don't care who sees, hears or laughs. You just get it in. Yes… car concerts. I love them so. Here are a few songs that have made me bust out my shimmy while singing into a hairbrush at the top of my lungs:

OneRepublic - Counting Stars

**Old, but I'm not THAT old. Young, but I'm not that bold,**

**Everything that kills me, makes me feel alive!**

Lorde - Royals

Sidenote: I have loved this song since it came out. And I LOVE the fact that this girl is so young (16) and gained popularity because of her sound cloud account! Her voice is AMAZING.

**We crave a different kind of buzz**

Justin Timberlake - Mirrors

I have a love affair with Justin's music. I have been ever since he went solo. I like some of the N*Sync riffs he sang and he can dance. During a time when "musicians" have no skills, he shines. He reminds me of the well rounded performers of the Motown era. He is cute, can sing and dance-- essentially he can put on a show. All by himself. I just refuse to go see him in concert… because he is NOT traveling with a musician.

And who doesn't love a love song?? Exactly.

Avicii - Wake Me Up

OMG- Love, love, love. Love the lyrics, love the sound, just freaking LOVE. If you pull up beside my car concert and I am dancing… 9 times out of 10, this song is on.

**Wake me up when it's all over. When I'm wiser and I'm older. All this time I was finding myself and I didn't know I was lost.**

**Life's a game for everyone, and love is the prize!**

Bruno Mars - Gorilla
Eh, this lucky leprechaun better watch out… I *might* just buy his album. Super sexy song. Just Fabulous. FYI- Music starts at the 2:00 minute mark. This reminds me of some vintage Prince songs (hear second verse- holy shit!)… so ALL GOOD!! Get it, little man!! :)

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