Wednesday, May 25, 2011

Wordless Wednesday

Sunday, May 22, 2011

Soulful Saturday - The Manhattans

I am posting this late- this week has been SO freaking crazy!! I got a call from Poppa Hot, Black and Bitter. He was pissed that last Saturday featured "that child molester!!" In my defense... I DID say that it would be nice if R. Kelly would stay out of legal trouble and keep his urine to himself! :) Seeing as how today was supposed to be the "Rapture" and according to some wacko in California, Jesus was going to swoop down and gather up the faithful and leave all of us heathens behind to prepare for the fire and brimstone of hell, I'm going to follow one of the ten commandments and "Honor my father and mother" by changing up the Soulful Saturday selection this week.

I'm taking it back a few decades... like, way back for some of y'all! This week will feature the musical stylings of The Manhattans. Poppa Hot, Black and Bitter will be impressed... and I am a little less of a heathen (for the moment)-- so take that! ;) This type of music is what I was brought up on and as far as I'm concerned this is what so called musicians should be aspiring to. Enjoy and I'll be posting regularly after the craziness dies down- few more days (I promise). I'll answer some of the emails that I received- and no, I am not not posting because I was taken in the Rapture... that, I would have posted all over Twitter! :)

There's No Me Without You

Kiss & Say Goodbye

Shining Star

You Send Me

Saturday, May 14, 2011

Soulful Saturday - R. Kelly

:) Showing Chicago some love on this cold, rainy Saturday... plus my friend Monica LOVES R. Kelly. Like something serious!! I met her freshman year of college- we lived down the hall from one another. We lived TOGETHER sophomore year, and in those two years she aided me in my R. Kelly learning... as in I know all the lyrics of every song made by R. Kelly through 1999. LOL She put up with my New Edition fascination, so it was a fair trade, right? I say yes! Most of these videos were made prior to his, um, legal troubles and at the height of 90s R&B music. He definitely has talent... now if he could keep his urine to himself and stay away from young(er) girls, he would be great!! hahahaha- I wish I was joking! ;) Without further adieu, Robert Kelly.

Honey Love

Your Body Is Calling

Trade In My Life

If I Could Turn Back the Hands of Time

When A Woman Loves

Sunday, May 08, 2011

More Precious than Rubies...

I know that it is Mother's Day so everyone is getting ready to go to church, or brunch, or is on every social networking site imaginable, claiming that their mom is the best mom that has ever lived. Well, I'm totally not going to church today. Why? Because I don't want to sit next to you and your mom, plus I hate how super OVERcrowded Mother's Day is. I get that she wants you to go, but really, I don't want to sit behind you while you are trying to flip through the Bible, looking for the scripture that was just announced- brush up on the books before you get there (hello, table of contents!) I may go to brunch, if I can get out of the house and to the restaurant by 6AM. Why so early? Uh, because if I go at normal people time, normal people will be there, that includes you and your misbehaving, bad ass kids and I do NOT want to sit next to y'all! As far as claiming that my mom is the best-- :) She totally is, and if you read this, you'll understand why.

So- I don't write about Momma Hot, Black and Bitter very often. It isn't because she isn't fascinating, worthy or exciting. She is all those things. I don't write about her often because 1. people like Momma HBB should not be reading my blog, 2. as great as my descriptions are, I really don't think I would do her justice and 3. anytime I try to write about her, I always get stuck on what to write about, where to start, etc.

1. People like Momma HBB shouldn't read my blog: Yeah, in case you hadn't noticed... I am a total heathen. For having grown up in a part of the Bible Belt, I have one of the dirtiest mouths this side of the Mississippi. I am always puzzled as to what to say next when someone asks me "do you kiss your mother with that mouth?" Um, why yes I do, thank you for asking... (I think I am leaning towards this as an answer: "Yes, I kiss my mother with this mouth... and your dad likes it too") See what I'm saying? Probably should not relay stories of my sainted mother while dropping "f" bombs, calling people morons or complaining about my bastard neighbors. I mean, where would I fit in "I love my mommy"? In a Fed Up Friday entry, or while describing Donald Trump as a douchebag? I think not. The fact is: Momma HBB is too classy a lady to be a regular subject of my writings.

2. My descriptions wouldn't do her justice: You know when you come across something magical, but you JUST can't put that magic into words to be comprehended by the masses? That is how I am when I talk about my mom. I call her my favorite girl- she is. With all the words in the English language, I cannot string together an all encompassing description that would paint the picture of what my mom means to me. I've tried. It is impossible. So, when people ask about her I say three things: we look just alike, she is my favorite girl and I want to grow up and be just like her (minus all the children and the heathen oldest daughter!) Other than that- her magic cannot be accurately described. Oh, I'll try a little further down, but no matter how flowery the words are, they will not be able to put all that Momma HBB gives or possesses into a neat little package for everyone to understand.

3. I don't know where to start: whenever someone is telling me a story and they say "I just don't know where to start" my go to comeback is "start at the beginning" (because I'm a smart ass- duh!) but when it comes to my mom, that is easier said than done. Let's see: the beginning, ok. My mom is a genius- granted, I think I am a brainiac, but mom? She graduated high school at 16. Me? 18. She is beautiful- and I am SO very lucky that we look so much alike, because I know exactly what I will look like when I am her age (thank the Lord!!) She is more compassionate than I'll ever be, definitely more patient, more fabulous with kids, WAY better in the kitchen, more understanding... she is just MORE.

I am not leaving a clear picture of my mom in this entry... I'll try again. Momma Hot, Black and Bitter is a wife, a listener, a disciplinarian, a hard worker, a go-between, skilled in chaotic organization, she knows everyone's birthday and middle name (and in our family- that is ALOT), a sweetheart, a fighter for her family (example- I know I'm a heathen and she might know it too, but I dare you to tell my momma that I am-- she will get you!), the BEST example of what a mom is supposed to be, considerate, care taker, boo boo kisser, a teacher, diaper changer (you read that right-- my youngest brother is still in diapers), comforter, a handy woman, potty trainer, doctor appointment maker and keeper, snuggler, dog wrangler, kid chaser, language master (she can understand the little kids better than anyone I know), human thermometer, the best JoJo, consummate host (eat your heart out Martha Stewart), cuddler, laundry expert, a taxi driver, medicine dispenser, cleaner, advice giver, humble, a cooker (and a feeder), bandage expert, the person you want praying for you, a balancer of crazy. She puts up with crying... from me... over the phone (enough said!) She never gets a day off. She has a smile that will brighten up the darkest room, a voice that sings "You are My Sunshine" better than any other person on the Earth, she loves surprises and decorating for Christmas (mom- the neighbors do NOT know that you compete against them every year with your Christmas decorations...). She appreciates effort, loves clean babies, good report cards, kids fresh from the shower (properly greased!), and me- she loves me! And I love her back. :) She. Is. Perfect... and she is all mine. Well, I do share her with a bunch of kids and dad, but you get the idea. I am so glad that we belong to each other and I hope that one day I can pay her back for all her hard work, by being the most wonderful Hot, Black and Bitter I can be!

Happy Mother's Day to my favorite girl! I love you!!

Monday, May 02, 2011

Gut Check Time

Osama Bin Laden is dead. Last night the President of the United States took to the airwaves and told the public that Osama was killed in Pakistan by US Military personnel. People have had very different responses to this news, and I have to say- some of y'all need to participate in what I call "gut check time" I am SO for real. Some of you need to really examine how you respond to things. I am going to go out on a limb and say that in trying times like these, some of you goofballs have no need for social media access. Need some examples? Ok, see below:

Debbie Downers: The news broke just before 10 last night and at 10:01 my facebook feed was full of assholes saying "This doesn't concern me" "I don't care that he is dead" "you guys are morons for thinking that this means anything" Damn, Debbie, get some happy pills. First of all- calling people morons because they are happy that the man who supposedly organized the attack on America on September 11th is... less than kind AND generally questioning a person's intelligence while saying something STUPID is frowned upon. Don't know which part of your statement is stupid? Let me tell you: our country has been at war for almost a decade. Where do you think funding comes from? Where do you think our government gets the money to allow our armed forces do their job? Um, from US. So, the death of Bin Laden concerns us ALL. Through taxes, we are ALL paying for two wars, so the demise of the leader of the other side involves you. I realize that some people will never be pleased- with anything, ever. Well Debbie, I'm good. Take your complaining ass some place else. Thanks for playing, Debbie... go take a pill.

Overly Righteous: You don't want to celebrate the death of a dictator? Absolutely fine with me. You don't want to celebrate the death of a man? Fantastic. I don't really either-- I am totally more of a 'torture mass murderers for the rest of their lives' kind of girl. I am not sure what kind of torture I would specialize in... but I digress. You don't want to celebrate Bin Laden's death in Ohio, Colorado, where ever the hell you are? Good for you- but y'all can NOT stop the celebration of others. Twitter feed was stacked with "Why are we celebrating the death of a man? Uh, because he took responsibility for murdering thousands of American citizens, said he would do it again, and evaded capture for 10 years- that's why. AND if you aren't in NYC or DC, or didn't know someone who died on 9/11, who the hell are you to judge those affected? I watched videos of people celebrating- they were singing God Bless America and waving the American flag- and possibly getting some closure on one of the turning points in their lives, and you judgemental bastards are mad? Get off your high horse. I am more concerned about the people who have no emotion at the breaking news than I am about the people pouring into the streets to celebrate the end of Bin Laden. So what if people who were holding up pictures of their lost loved ones on the news 10 years ago went back to Ground Zero and expressed happiness? Let them. That is not your place to judge them. Want to judge someone? Judge those nasty "church goers" that picket the funerals of service men and women, holding up signs that newly deceased soldiers who paid the ultimate sacrifice for our freedoms are going to hell. Those that happily cheer at the funerals of men and women who died defending their right to free speech. Protest them. Be mad at them.... but the thousands cheering in DC and NYC, you should be HAPPY that they are getting some kind of closure. If Osama Bin Laden's death (you DO remember what he did to get on the Most Wanted List, right?!) is what gives them closure, then let them have that for a night. I have to say- I'm happy he is dead. I would have preferred some heinous torture, but dead works for me. And you can judge me all day- I don't care... it won't change my mind.

Polarizers: The people who are using this as a platform to further divide the American people are sickening. Every once in a while, you have GOT to learn that it is ok to congratulate the other side. Even I do it occasionally. If W was in the White House when Bin Laden was killed, I would have congratulated him. Thanked him. Taken a day off from bashing him (ok, ok... half a day- he is loaded with material for jokes). People are acting like they can't congratulate and thank our President. Why? Because you are a Republican? Drop that shit. Upon hearing the news last night, my friend said "You know, I don't like Obama's economic stance, but I am SO happy he helped get that rat bastard." That is how it should be. I am not asking anyone to stop their less than liberal thoughts, or become Democrats (I'm not even a Democrat), or name their next child Barack. No, I am saying.... we are all Americans. Under the administration of Barack Obama, one of the most dangerous terrorist in the world was killed. Congratulate YOUR President. You don't have to like shit else he does. Ever. But right now- damn, say thank you. Even W sent his congratulations. Quit acting like you have no manners. Go back to being a hater tomorrow.

Political Opportunists: To Donald the Dick and who ever works at Fox news that made the "mistake" of putting "Obama Bin Laden is dead" on the television stream last night... TAKE THAT!! Seriously, keep up the games, the name calling, the holier than thou attitude, the bickering, the racist antics- all your antics... keep them coming. Because we, as the American public, will tire of you. (I'm already tired of you). You can bet on that.

Thank you to President Barack Obama; members of every branch of the Armed Forces- at home and abroad; American citizens that made the ultimate sacrifice; fair reporters; members of Congress and especially Joe Schmo-- we financed this war, were patient and got our man... Now let's bring back our troops and begin the stabilization of THIS country.

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