Sunday, December 09, 2018

Black Girl Magic, Part II

More lessons learned during this roller coaster ride called life. For the first 10, check out last week's article.

Lesson 11: For everything, there is a season. Listen: you are going to lose some folks along the way. Everybody's finish line is different. Some of your "Day 1" friends won't make it to year 41. 

Lesson 12: Learn how to PROPERLY apply makeup. Y'all. Stop being in these streets looking like you are always on your way to a Halloween party. When folks tell you that "less is more" they mean it. I mean it. Instagram filters can't hide a heavy hand. 

Lesson 13: Eat your veggies. Find (at least) five different vegetables that you like. Eat them, thank me later.

Lesson 14: Shout/Argue. Listen, I know that it is frowned upon, but really it is about presentation. I argue ALL the time. Now, every argument isn't a shouting match... but I never leave folks with any question about where we stand. I am VERY capable of getting my point across, and there *may* be yelling/curse words or there *may* be an even scarier tactic taken (that smooth, calm voice right before the volcano erupts). In any case, say that you mean and mean what you say.

Lesson 15: Have a signature drink. More important than you think. This is what your college years are for! Experiment with all sorts of alcohol on your 21st birthday and the couple of months following it. Learn where your breaking point is... and stay away from it when you are out and about- like on a first date... or networking. No one likes a drunk in public. Or a puker. Know those limits!

Lesson 16: Don't hang out with dicks. Momma Hot, Black and Bitter told me a million years ago: you are known by the company that you keep. You are. Choose accordingly. 

Lesson 17: Plans made at 16 might not be life at 41. Woooo- MESSAGE. At 41 I am not doing what I thought I would be doing. At the age of 16 I would have never thought that I would be back in my hometown, that I would be married, that I would have a kid. None of this was on my radar, but that is the best thing about life-- it is full of unknowns, twists and turns, punches to the face... and fantastic surprises.

Lesson 18: Drink Water. Do it, especially after a long night of trying to figure out your alcohol tolerance levels. You're welcome. 

Lesson 19: Believe the bad behavior. We all have seen some signs of bad behavior from people in our lives. We have "friends" who throw chi in our face when shit gets tough; folks who don't cheer when we are winning; assholes who allow other people to talk shit about us, etc. There had been plenty of times where I have heard "you know, I don't usually do X,Y,Z, but..." Yes you do. When you see the warning signs, start to pan your exit from toxic ass people. 


Lesson 20: Take a Social Media timeout. Seriously, once a month. It can be 4 hours, a day, a week, whatever. Do it to prove to yourself that you can. Take a nap, read a book, get a massage, watch reality tv... just don't check Facebook/Twitter/Snapchat or (the ultimate time suck) Pinterest. 

Damn, I am old as shit... I still have 21 more lesson to go! LOL 



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