Sunday, February 26, 2012

Soulful Saturday - Christina Aguilera

Poor Christina. She is so super talented. I mean out of the mouseketeers that came out in the 90s (think Britney, Justin, Ryan Gosling, etc.) she has more talent in one strand of that awful weave, wig, pieces (whatever she is trying to pull off these days) than the rest of them do in their whole bodies... and that is saying a lot, since I am totally infatuated with both Ryan and Justin. But why, poor Christina, do you insist on being/looking/acting such a mess?

I am totally going to need her to get it together-- PLEASE wear pants when you leave the house (stockings are not pants substitutes); please find a new stylist that will tame that crazy rat nest on your head, darling!! I mean, I absolutely adore you, but girlfriend, there could be something living in that tall, frizzed out craziness. Really. And for the love of all that is holy... none of us are 19 anymore. There are outfits that I ROCKED when I was 19... that I will NEVER rock again. My body has changed. So has yours. Love the body that you have. Dress THAT body... not the body you had when you were 19. In short: um, I'm going to need you to have a "Waiting To Exhale" moment and burn about half of your wardrobe. All the super tight, ill fitting, ill advised things need to be taken to the closest garbage dumpster, doused in kerosene and set ablaze. Trust me. I love you! :) I've been around since the beginning and still loved you through the "Dirrty" stage with that two tone, slightly dread locked look... and chaps. Yeah. Let's not forget the dark hair from the "Stripped" album; that was...interesting. I am totally sure that I can love you through this mess, I am just going to need you to take action ASAP.

So before she sat in between Cee-Lo and Blake on the Voice, Christina made some wonderful music. Most people don't like her runs during live performances, but I expect them and like them. That is her thing and I am definitely a fan. The ability to sing seems to be an option in some singing careers, but not hers. She definitely has the skill, as seen below! Keep on singing those songs, girl... and find a stylist.

I Turn To You


The Voice Within


Ain't No Other Man

Bonus: Walk Away


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