Dear America

Dear America:

Hey girl. It is your favorite caramel colored girlfriend. Originally, I was going to wish you a belated birthday, but honey, we have some things that we need to talk about. I am feeling some type of way about you. I mean, you just turned 240 years old on Monday and you are not adulting well. I mean, I really think that you are too old for these ongoing problems that you have. These last few years, our relationship has been strained and so now, here I am, with an ultimatum.

Listen. You gotta stop lying to yourself and others. America, you keep telling folks that everyone is welcome and that you are friendly. Ma'am, nothing is farther from the truth. We all know that everyone isn't welcome. Why do you keep touting that line of thought? History tells us that it isn't true... What you allow in your house shows us, every day, that you don't want diversity here. Within your borders, people (of color) are ROUTINELY marginalized, CONSISTENTLY demonized, REGULARLY disenfranchised and HABITUALLY murdered for simply being. You don't have love for us, girl. And when one of us stands up to tell you just how unfair the treatment that we are receiving is, the clap back is swift. You aren't nice, chick. You allow our children to be murdered; our husbands to be taken. You don't blink when our elderly die in poverty, unable to afford the drugs that could keep them alive. It doesn't bother you that our neighborhoods are falling apart or that we are overlooked for jobs and promotions. You are not surprised and often find excuses for police who brutalize your citizenry. I mean, why do you keep inviting folks to your house if you don't want to straighten up first? You know what I mean? I just don't understand. Why invite family over, only to spit in their faces? That is what you are doing. You are spitting in our faces-- and we have had enough.  

You pretend to love us, but that love is only good if we stay in the boxes that you have picked out for us. You want us to make you look good. You want us to entertain you-- on tv, at the movie theater, through sports and at concerts. But, you don't want us to ever think that we are more than that. We are here to entertain you and the moment we stop, you turn on us like an inebriated spouse. Often you use us for entertainment then for target practice. We are targets for your abuse-- in which you want us to suffer silently. Stay in our place, save face (for you) and do it all quietly. America, girl, that is not how this works. That is not how any of this works.

Look, I want to take this time to let you know that you wouldn't have your house without us. We have been here from the beginning. Actually, darling, now would be the time to remind you that you brought many of us here against our will. And now you are systematically, emotionally and physically, killing the same folks you enslaved all those years ago. America, girl, you are too old for this! Since we just celebrated your birthday, I feel the need to remind you what happened 240+ years ago that brought about your birth. America, YOU are the result of the ultimate protest. Your founders were tired of being shit upon, so they left the game and started YOU. Now, darling, let's use some common sense here... If you have spent all of your years shitting on some folks, what, exactly can you foresee them doing? Are you trying to get history to repeat itself? Are you trying to make an uprising happen? Do you think that we will allow an extermination of certain folks just happen?

America, I am writing this letter because I love you. I love the idea of you. I love being a part of you. Now I want you to love me back. I want you to respect me and other Brown and Black folks. I want to be able to be proud of you when I leave your shores for vacation or business. I want folks to be able to look to you for guidance... not just military or monetary help. I want to be able to tell my daughter that her life will be respected because she is considered a gem in her own country. A gem... not a burden. In short America, I need you to get your shit together, sis. I mean I can't keep writing you warnings about this fucked up behavior. If you keep disrespecting your citizens they will rise up-- it is inevitable. We are not expendable. Our children are not to be used as kindling in the streets, America. Our fathers and breadwinners are not to be brutalized as examples, America. Our mothers and daughters are not here to be assaulted by you, America. We are not expendable. Saying that doesn't make us ungrateful, or selfish or racist. It makes us citizens and it makes you accountable. Stop murdering us. Stop excusing our murders. Just stop it.

Fed Up Friday - Deadbeats

Ok, as I was reading the newspaper electronically today and one of the bigger headlines was about a warrant that is out with Terrell Owens because he is behind on child support. Um, what? I am taken aback. Then I go to YouTube and type in child support. Why did I do that? Do you know how many videos there are with people talking about child support? It is some kind of craziness. There are videos with women complaining that their child's father doesn't pay, videos of men crying about how much they have to pay, he says, she says... There are a lot of women who are all "I don't need your money. My baby doesn't want for anything..." Whoa, bitch. There are plenty of men who say "that hoe is spending all my money. How do I know that she is spending it on my kid. I have to pay this much for this long, blah, blah, blah." Yeah-- both groups sound dumb as hell. So I have a response for everyone involved and no one is going to like it-- how about that? :)

Women

Let me start out with some common sense advice: vaginas are not special. Let me rephrase: YOUR vagina is not special. There are hundreds of videos on YouTube where women say: "My child's father doesn't take of his other kids, but he is going to take care of mine." Um, no lady, he won't. Why would he? You have already stood by and watched while he didn't take care of the little defenseless children that he already has. Silence is acceptance. And you somehow think that he will treat you differently? Why? Because you think you have sunshine in your pants? Let's be real. If he has kids that he ignores and doesn't care for, there is a strong possibility that he will do your kids the same way. Your vagina is not going to change his mind. You thinking that you are the baddest bitch is not going to change his habits. You also need to stop it with the "I don't need him or his money." Bitch please. Yes you do need him AND his money. Your kid needs him AND his money. Hell, I need you to take his money because I don't want to have to help pay for you and your kids. Oh, I said it: if you don't like the man that you are sleeping with, you should not be sleeping with him because children are a life time commitment to that person. They will always be a part of your life. Your child will always need to know BOTH of their parents. I don't watch Oprah but even I know that she said that when people show you who they are, believe them. People will show you who they are-- if you choose to ignore the signs, then that is on you. We all know how babies get here, right?! So if you meet a guy who is someone you only want... to see naked, then you need to take all precautions to assure that you will not be stuck co-parenting with a deadbeat. I blame you. Ladies, we are no victims. Generally we are full participants. Having a child by a no good man is NOT going to make him suddenly become good; it will simply saddle you up with a jackass. A little something you should think about before you have unprotected sex with some guy that you have nothing nice to say about.

Men

Children are expensive. (Clearly if T.O. can't pay his child support.) Just so we are all on the same page: that 30 seconds of pleasure can cost you hundreds of thousands of dollars. Again, something you should think about BEFORE you try to "hit that." Also, should the state HAVE to make you pay for your children? No, if you are a man, you would make sure your children were taken care of... HOWEVER, we are surrounded by very tall boys in men's clothing so states have to intercede. I'm good with that. And let me just say to you assholes who purposely don't work and have a court order to pay less than $100 a month and have the NERVE to complain: shut the hell up. Dude, a baby will go through $100 in a week, easy. Your children don't just need to eat when you are able to 'come up' with child support. They can't wait to get clothes until you hustle up some cash. They cannot wait for diapers until you deem it ok to send over some money. Some of the boys on YouTube also felt it necessary to call the mother of their children names. Um, if she is a whore, what does that make you? If she is a gold digger, what the fuck is she doing with your stingy ass? If she was truly in it for the money, she would not have to beg your punk ass for $100. If you can call her names, it reflects badly on YOU... because you chose to sleep with her, and she is now the mother of your child, so what does that say about your judgment? If you can sleep at night, knowing that your children are not being taken care of because you can't or won't provide for them, What does that say about YOU? Holding your children's money hostage will buy you one thing: a first class ticket to hell.

Child support would not be such a hot topic button if people were more choosy about who they had sex with, who they choose to procreate with. So that is it, ladies and gentlemen, keep it in your pants or pay the price, with a deadbeat partner or a hefty child support order. Condoms don't sound bad now, do they?